A weekend farce

My wife got home just after 2 this morning, which woke me up as I realised that La Serpiente was sleeping next to me. It’s like an English country house farce, with everyone in the wrong bed. When the kids woke up properly at 7:30, I was a bit of a mess and it was all I could do to stop myself turning the telly on and telling them to have at it.
Instead, we played with playdough for a while, I failed to get them to eat much breakfast and then we went outside to go scootering, which the two sabotaged by veering off to a play area instead and then fighting over the see-saw, the roundabout and an indescribable climbing frame type thing with lights and noises built in. Destroyer almost fell off the roundabout face first, got angry when I caught her, and then I bundled them back upstairs just as my wife was waking up.

I’d had enough of this and went to the doctor to pick up a prescription, drank a large coffee at Starbucks, came back, fell asleep on the sofa while everyone else napped. This would turn out to be a strategic error as nobody woke up until 3, when it was drizzling rain, and so nobody would go to sleep promptly tonight. At least I got to see the mail: two toy owls has arrived from Canada for the girls.

We went to the library (until the end of January the family can borrow up to 32 books) and again, both children were raging about something or other all the way there. Not having enough seaweed to eat or something like that.

With all their books, spirits were lifted. We went home, ordered in thermonuclear Thai food, plonked the kids in front of Netflix for half an hour, then spent two hours trying to get them to go to sleep, and now I’m lying on my bed wondering where half the weekend went. Oh what a farce.

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