It’s got almost to the end of the month without me eating any meat, so tonight I put the girls on the back of the bike and rode up to 90-somethingth Street, to Dick’s drive through restaurant. I got 4 regular, plain hamburgers and one deluxe, and then we rushed home.
The burgers seemed really, really small. I suppose there’s been size inflation with all the fancy hipster wagyu beef burgers in the world, so a hamburger that is only an eighth of a pound of beef feels miniscule. And yet back when I was growing up, that was the full thing you ate at McDonald’s, the Big Mac being just too much. Did the burgers shrink? Did the world get bigger?

I scoffed mine double quick, and the girls were less than enthused, ending up eating chips and cheese and crackers, so I got a bit of theirs too. This wasn’t really the most transcendent of meat experiences I’ve had in my life.

Also, confusingly, because of covid they won’t serve French fries at the moment. They do at the other Dick’s branches, which confuses me more. Why would it be safe to make them elsewhere but not here? But I didn’t want to argue that and come across like a complete pleb. Why make anyone’s life harder?

So: acceptable burger, but much too small. What will it be in May?

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