New Year’s Eve, 2015


I’m either a misanthrope and a mathematician, but either way I don’t like celebrating the New Year. It’s just an arbitrary change from one time period to another; nobody gets excited and stays up to celebrate it not being August any more each year, so why should the 31st of December be any different?

To torture me, my family made me play Yatzy (the copyright dodging/open source version of Yahtzee) which is a game that seems devoid of skill, as all you do is throw dice again and again. Or perhaps I’m in a huff because I came last.

Then they made me play backgammon, and without meaning to (I wanted to just get back to reading my book) I beat my wife, my mother, my father and my sister, in two cases getting all my pieces of the board without my opponent getting off any of theirs at all, and three times exitying the game with a double on the dice. Clearly, fate was shining on me tonight. Or they all deserved it for making me play Yatzy.

This morning, we took the girls to Godstone Farm, where La Serpiente got to stroke a rabbit and a chick, and we got to see some freshly made (two week old) piglets, a couple of bizarrely feathered Sebastopol chickens, and some dinosaurs made from fibreglass.

As well as the farmyard buildings full of farmyard animals, there’s a barn with a soft play area, which was fun for La Serpiente, but for us adults was a bit more painful as we had to contort ourselves between foam rollers and around tight corners, in pursuit of our excited, gibbering progeny.

There was also quite a few muddy puddles, which I thought La Serpiente would enjoy jumping in (having been indoctrinated by Peppa Pig) but she was mercifully restrained, and so we got back to the car three hours later without having a child soaked to the skin with farmyard muck.

It was horrendously cold today, and I was only wearing wellington boots, which left my feet like blocks of ice, and they don’t seem to have properly defrosted yet. I guess I’m just not built for this kind of weather.

Tomorrow I’m hoping is different to today, in so far as I hope La Serpiente sleeps tonight and doesn’t keep me up half the night trying to get her to sleep, leaving me zombified tomorrow. Given that there are people letting off fireworks at thirty minute intervals (are they like me, satirising the New Year celebrations by just firing off rockets at any old time?) I don’t hold out much hope for a night of slumber, but thus far she’s been copacetic. Then again, perhaps that’s the secret to her sleeping soundly: having been raised in Chinatown, perhaps the sound of gunpowder being detonated by amateurs is a comforting sonic balm to my daughter.

Tomorrow, I resolve that I’ll look at my resolutions.


One response to “New Year’s Eve, 2015”

  1. Goodness, what is there to say about a game called Yatzy?
    It’s like MahJongg – my mum loves to play and she always enthusiastically suggests I game when we get 4 people together, but everybody else remembers that I win every time and mumbles off to do something else.
    I love Godstone Farm.
    This is not really a cold day by UK standards, but like relativity, maybe there is something about standing on a farm to make it so.

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