Economical Rice and angry babies


On Monday, in the Kopitiam beneath K K Hospital, I found a branch of Economical Rice. I was going to make a joke about how they have made a science out of dismal food (zing!!!) but the sheer wilful madness of a food outlet that has menu items like “less rice” (how much less rice than some rice is less rice?) cannot be joked about. A man would probably beat my head in with a ladle.

I was thinking about Economical Rice during the interregnum period, between La Serpiente going to sleep at 8:30 and Destroyer waking up at 9:30. My wife had gone out and left a bottle of milk for me to feed Destroyer with, but after a few cheerful moments where she lay in my lap and burbled, she grasped the bottle with both hands, pushed it away and began to scream at me.

And scream, and scream and scream. I offered her milk. I changed her. I bounced her and patted her back and all that would happen was that the screams would diminish for a moment or two then return at full strength.

After almost an hour of this nonsense, I called my wife and told her to come home early. On the one hand I feel shabby to have admitted defeat in the onslaught from my youngest, but on the other I couldn’t risk La Serpiente waking up and then having two monsters scream at me. Or I was weak from this week’s festival of puking.

Tonight I go to sleep, and dream of rice, and of a sub-20 minute 5k, and of non screaming, milk drinking babies. To tomorrow, then.


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